For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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