There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
