I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
