All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
