I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
