Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize