I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
