At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
