My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
