i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
