I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
