So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Soap is not a condiment
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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