you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
