i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
