and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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