I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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