everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
We are all done wearing pants today
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
