He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
The adults are the big ones right?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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