she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Randomize
