playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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