i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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