she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
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