we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
