Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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