Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
