Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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