Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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