let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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