i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
