I'm eating all of the evidence.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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