chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
