i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
