I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
