Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
