: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
