he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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