I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
