ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Randomize