READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
