We're like a lot better than the average bears
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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