butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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