If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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