Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
