So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Randomize
