I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
