dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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