the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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