I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
