k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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