Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
